Middle Class Institutes…And The Zombies That Attend Them
Hey squares. So, I haven’t written in a while. Well, I’ve been writing a lot, but not in the free form rambling type of style I used to cling to as my only form of solace in the early days of my awakening. I plan to start writing like this a whole lot more though. I think my random ramblings act as a sort of channeling, which I know will be beneficial for myself, and whoever stumbles across this page and happens to read whatever it is I pour out.
Today what inspired me to go on this rant, are thoughts and feelings stirred by this new book I found. I know I’m going to be writing a lot of these posts as I dissect this amazing treasure of a book. It’s called “Being In Dreaming: An Initiation in the Sorcerer’s World” written by Florinda Donner. I highly recommend everyone read this book. I’ll probably do some type of review of it when I’ve fully made my way through these pages.
Ok, here I go. What stirred me to ramble write today are the topics the book is discussing where I’m at right now. One of the characters in this book, Carlos Casteneda, has just told the main character of the book that she’s a spoiled middle class brat, who’s grasping at straws and desperately trying to make herself relevant by attending college. Here’s an excerpt from the book on this subject. (Brace yourselves; it’s a long paragraph…well then again this whole post is long, bear with me folks):
“Juan Matus once asked me a grand question: ‘What do you think a university is?’ I of course, answered him like a social scientist: ‘A center of higher learning.’ He corrected me and declared that a university should be called a ‘Middle-Class Institute’ because it is the institution we attend to further perfect our middle-class values. We attend the institute to become professionists, he said. The ideology of our social class tells us that we must prepare ourselves for occupying managerial positions. Juan Matus said that men go to the middle-class institute to become engineers, lawyers, doctors, etc., and women go there to get a suitable husband, provider, and father of their children. Suitable is naturally defined by middle class values.’ I wanted to contradict him. I wanted to shout at him that I knew people who weren’t necessarily interested in a career or looking for a spouse, that I knew people who were interested in ideas, in learning for its own sake. But I didn’t know such people…”
Now. If you’re anything like I was a mere year ago, or like the majority of my friends from college right now, that excerpt may have disturbed you for many reasons. It may have even insulted you, or made you angry. It may have led you to believe that I’m belittling you, or that your whole life up to this point has been for nothing, and the pursuit of knowledge is a lie. You may be thinking things like, your intentions for being in school are pure! You’re there because you want to help people, because you care about this world and want to give back, because you want to work hard towards something you can be proud of, because you genuinely have a passion to learn. My senior year self, although still blinded by the collegiate veil of deception, wouldn’t have agreed to that extent, but freshman year Meg probably would have word for word. Regardless, to my current self, this paragraph has summarized everything I subconsciously felt during my entire college career.
Middle class kids coming from middle class families, go to middle class institutions with the hope of gaining a stable career, which will allow them the luxury of what? Cultivating a middle class family reality of their own. Oh how exciting all of that sounds. It’s nothing more than perpetuating the cycle. And do you know why my stating my opinion of this matter may sting a little (or a lot)? It’s because deep down, you know it’s true.
Let’s say, for discussion’s sake, that everything went amazing for you in college (although these days, that is definitely not the reality of the situation for most college students.) Let’s say that you made it through school with awesome grades. You joined all those clubs and sought after sororities and fraternities, you did community service and had amazing internships, all while still finding the time to occasionally party and make long lasting relationships with your classmates. You made it into that amazing after graduate program, you attained that prestigious title you’ve been grinding so very hard for, and because of it, you earned the perfect job. You found that perfect mate that matches your drive and ideologies, and you even had some wonderful little middle class kids along the way. Now you got that fancy house and car, and everything you could ever hope to buy…everything is going just fuckin SWELL. Now tell me, are you happy?
A lot of people would be like well DUH MEGAN. I still can’t figure out the part of this that’s supposed to sound so goddamn awful. That’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of. Well my response to that would be, is it REALLY though? If this is everything you’ve ever dreamed of, your dreams are BORING AS FUCK. Tell me, is this everything you’ve ever dreamed of, or a dream you bought from someone else, at the outrageous price of your soul? As a child, do you think you spent your days day dreaming about a house and a stable career, a spacious backyard with a patio and a pool, and a fancy title that told everyone how powerful you are? If you said yes, then you are clearly in denial, and you may as well stop reading here. But, if you’re being completely honest with yourself, if you are any type of critical thinker with your soul still intact, you probably said no. Kids dream of infinity. Kids want to grow up to be the tooth fairy or an astronaut. Kids want to fly and jump and climb. Sure that pool and backyard will sound awesome to younger you, but not because you cared about owning them, only because you wanted to play!
See, kids are simple. Kids are magic, and we should all try to be more like them. Adults, we’re painfully dull and boring. Even if you got everything that college promised us, I guarantee you would still find yourself slipping into boredom over time, because that good old American dream didn’t leave any room for growth, evolution, wonder, and FUN. And that’s all based on an ideal world. If you’re currently enrolled or fresh out of school, you know all too well that that’s the exact opposite of how your college career went. Oh I got my degree, but along with it I had 4 years of torture trying to act like I cared about ANYTHING I was forced to learn to be considered successful, I worked my ass off trying to support myself with a job outside of school, I went through hell adjusting to social norms and trying to navigate this fucked up adult world that I knew literally NOTHING about, (how do you file taxes again…am I too old to just write “exempt”?). And now that I’m finally done, I have a worthless ass piece of paper that STILL can’t get me a decent job, let alone a job I like. I moved away from all the dear friends I had in school, and I rarely ever get to talk to them beyond more than small talk, or on a good day, about how much we all hate our lives, AND I’m in debt up to my eyeballs. Man, college was SO worth it.
Ok. I’m done making you feel like your life sucks beyond reason, because that’s definitely NOT my goal. Your life is worth more than you could even realize. But I’m talking about your life as a passionate, caring, empathetic human being that wants to make the world a better place; not your programmed, boring middle class sham of a personality they gave you. Who convinced us that we need college degrees to help people? For all the doctors that spent 10+ years in medical school, it’s likely all you do now is see patients for all of 5 seconds, just long enough to prescribe them some poison to buy, so your pockets stay fat, and they keep coming back. For the lawyers that wanted to make a difference in how the justice system is run, let’s be honest. What can you as an individual do, when our corrupt ass system let’s cops murder people in cold blood, and then let’s them walk free without so much a slap on the wrist. And to the teachers, principles, superintendents and professors, what good can you do in yet another corrupt system, where children are reduced to test scores and learn to regurgitate rather than think critically? Ok you got those test scores up, is that helping this child that’s homeless, and goes home hungry every night? What good is it helping them to learn useless ways to multiply, when their parents are abusive, or they’re depressed because their classmates bully them? Or maybe you helped a few kids get into college. Then what? Didn’t we just talk about how much college is a waste of time!?!? Our children aren’t learning anything! We keep them busy until they can join the work force…our careers, our titles, our pieces of paper don’t MEAN anything. They help us come up with more and more band aids so we can continue acting like this virtual reality we’re stuck in is actually worth all the hype, but deep down, we know it’s not.
If you want to help people, then HELP people. Your MD title doesn’t make you any more qualified to help someone that my good old fashioned passion to do so does. If you want to have a legacy you can be proud of, then start acting now. Be the person you want to become. Clinging to piece of paper of those dumb ass initials at the beginning of your name won’t help you feel successful if that wasn’t already something that’s inside you. If you want to dream, then REALLY dream. I’m not talking about boring dreams like a husband or kids, dream bigger dude! We’re in our 20’s, we have our entire lives to settle down and procreate. There’s really nothing more astounding that you could come up with?
All my conversations are starting to blur together. Boys have got all my girlfriends upset, I’ve got friends struggling to find the motivation to go to their so sought after jobs everyday. I have friends that think they discover a new career path every other week…”but no this time I KNOW this is the right path for me!” My sisters are banging their heads against the wall trying to find a fuck to give about their useless college courses. Dude. Everybody. Stop! I need each and every person reading this post to let that shit go. All of it. Let. It. Go. If you’re confused and unhappy, no amount of school, no job, no title, no amount of money is going to fix that, because you’re looking for love in all the wrong places.
So you may be saying, ok MA’AM, since you seem to know everything, just what the fuck am I supposed to do, being that everything I’ve tried to think of doing is flawed, now what!? My advice is…to be. To be your boldest truest self. Just. Be.
You may be saying, that’s it? I just read this epic ass rant so you could tell me some useless hippie advice like “JUST BE”. Yes. That is exactly what I’m saying. If you are indeed seeking self fulfillment, because let’s face it, you can say you’re going to school to learn, and be a good person, and help people and blah blah blah, none of those are at the root for why you’re really there. At the end of the day, don’t ever lie to yourself. You’re in school for the same reason this girl is chasing a husband, for the same reason, he’s chasing money and pussy, because we’re all grasping at straws trying to make our lives matter, we don’t know what the fuck else to do!
Well if you want to make your life matter, grasping at straws is certainly a useless way to try to accomplish that. Things are rarely as complicated as they seem to be. If you ant to figure out your souls purpose, the reason why you’re here, what you can do to be happy, look inside! Figure out what it is that makes your soul sing, and do that to the fullest extent, to the best of your ability. Now me being completely honest, not everyone has this luxury. People have bills, and families, kids and responsibilities. But for a whole lot of us, we don’t have any of those things. We’re just young adults lost in this societal soup trying to figure out which way to go. So let’s pave our own lanes, create our own destinations, and let’s make reality magical! Who said you need expensive pieces of paper to make a name for yourself, to make yourself happy, and even to get rich! You don’t need college for any other those things! Since coming to LA, you don’t know how many young and successful kids I’ve met, (and I mean kids, like people 25 and under, even some teenagers!) that are out here doing what comes natural to them, being their amazing creative free selves, and they have more money and connections at their fingertips than any professional I’ve ever seen!
We’re a new generation, and we need to embrace that fact. We can’t keep adhering to their ideas of success, to their definition of fulfillment, because it’s all bs. You’re going to be just as miserable once you get out of school as you were going in. And that’s because we live in a world where people are detached from self. The only way we can heal this fucked up world, is to return to self, to focus on ourselves, and once we help ourselves, only then can we help the whole! You can’t fix a painfully outdated system by still willingly participating in said fucked up system. Stand up for yourselves, stand up for our futures! My parents didn’t have to face even half the struggles I did in school and this current job market, and my sister is aware of all the bs already, and she’s only a sophomore. It’s getting worse, at an exponential rate. By the time our kids are our age, will there even be a social structure left for them to participate in? I really can’t say that I see that being a reality. Shit’s gotta change and something’s gotta give. You can conform to someone else’s dream of reality, and stay a middle class zombie forever, or you can start molding you own reality. The power is yours to choose.
Thanks for sticking with me through this rant, just had to get that off my chest. If this post left you with even more questions than when you started, stay posted for a follow up article I’m writing about the many ways you can get out the system, be your own boss, and discover talents and skills you didn’t even know you had!
Until next time squares. Stay bossy.