A Plus Size Woman’s Message to Men

A Plus Size Woman’s Message to Men

“C’mere wit yo BIG OLE self…” MEN this $H*T has got to STOP!
A recurring conversation my plus size friends and I have is about how (some) men (due to our size) approach us in the wrong manner. They focus on our size as the main reason they want to approach. Saying things like “I love me some big girls” when that ish is extremely unnecessary. With that said, I feel it’s my duty to let you men know you got it all wrong when it comes to approaching plus size girls…observe.
First and foremost,  I don’t need to hear that you “love big girls.” I really could give two craps about what girls you like. Instead of focusing on a physical attribute that I may consider a flaw, why don’t you say something like “I love women who carry themselves well” or “I love a woman with short hair”? Now I bet your thinking, but don’t women want to hear that we love things about them that they may not deem perfect? Well yes, but there is simply more to me than my shape. Leave the word big or anything that will remind me that 1. I’m Fat and 2. That you are ONLY trying to holla because of this fact, out. BOO! You suck. As mentioned before, say something like “wow you look really beautiful in that dress you’re wearing.” That statement lets me know you like my shape and my style in one. I’m officially flattered. But seriously, saying you love big girls don’t mean shit to me cause if a skinny mini walked by that looked like Beyonce or somebody…you’d be telling her how much you love a woman who stays in shape. SHUT THE FRECK UP dude! You’re full of it. This leads me to my next point…
“Boy you need to stop playin…”

Don’t tell me that you hate or dislike skinny girls. Last time I checked the skinniest girl in the world never had no problem getting a man due to her size. But since you came along and told me you “hate skinny girls” that’s all the sudden supposed to have me and my flab jumping for joy? Fuck Outta here son! Half the time what men qualify as skinny and thick are NOT the same as what big women (this is really more my opinion than anything) define as skinny or thick.  If you ask me, anything under a size 12 is skinny to me pretty much. If you didn’t even know F21 and H&M sells plus size clothing…you’s a skinny bitch. If you don’t have to specially order shit online cause it doesn’t come in your size in the store…you’s a skinny bitch. If your pants don’t roll down under your stomach when you sit in a chair…you’s a skinny bitch. (That one just made me roll LMAO)! Anyway, a guy telling me he don’t like skinny girls has set himself up for failure. If I find out that your last girlfriend was a size 10…or you came to me AFTER you tried to holla at that size 4, you officially look like a dude on trash. Save yourself the trouble and just compliment my hair, my face or my intelligence.  If you just say “you’re attracted to beautiful women” that size 10 ex girlfriend or size 4 you got the reject from won’t be held against you. Not to mention, I have skinny friends…so what if I seriously consider dating you? I can’t have you around them talking about how skinny girls are disgusting to you and such. They gonna hate you and then that’s gonna be MY problem! Ain’t nobody got time for that!

That’s a French ass name Yvonne!

And has anyone noticed that the men who make a scene about loving big women be acting like Darrell from the “Can I Have Your number” sketch? You honestly expect me to be flattered? Boy bye! LMAO!

Or maybe more like this dude….

Last but not frecking LEAST…DO NOT approach with the “big girls need love too” frame of mind. Yes we do need love, but not from any ole Tom, Dick, Harry and Dionte. Big girls have standards just like every other woman. If you tried to hit on 5 skinny women who all turned you down and decided you’d “try your luck” with a big woman because you believe our standards won’t be as high; HAVE SEVERAL SEATS! We are FULLY aware that we are not what the general society defines as “beautiful.” We are FULLY aware of the fact that many men prefer a skinny woman and have no problem discriminating against us. We are FULLY aware of several more odds stacked against us that I won’t even mention, YET us plus size girls still have high self esteem and KNOW we are just as beautiful and valuable as a woman who is a size 4. We don’t need pity dates. So PLEASE do yourself a favor and sit your ass all the way down if you really aren’t feeling the big girl life. We aren’t going to give you a chance just because you think we can’t get a man due to our size. FAILURE! You got it all wrong boo. So just stop. And even if are a guy that does truly love big women, big ups to you. But just because you claim to love big women doesn’t mean you are automatically getting a response.
In conclusion, men rather than reminding me that I’m a BIG GIRL why can’t you just say that I look nice and that you found me attractive? Don’t have to put on a Broadway show about how much you love big girls. Keep it simple. Some men be doing WAY too much. Example: (in Jerome from Martin voice) ”Look at you girl all BIG and sexy.” Stop right there. Leave the big part out. I know that already cause I look at myself every day. I’m the only one allowed to use the word big when describing myself! Just stick to the basics and be on your A game and we’ll be good. Ok that’s enough of my rant…I’m out!
Until Next Time Squares…
D Frankly

P.S: I know y’all seen that Dove Beauty Campaign picture. Is that not the biggest load of crap you’ve ever seen? None of the women in that picture represents the many types around the world or even in the USA. ALL OF THE WOMEN in that picture are AVERAGE MODELS…just different sizes. I can’t think of any of my girls (skinny, thick or big) that truly fit any of the body types in that photo…so what the fuck are they talking about “real women” or “real beauty?” I get what they’re trying to do but they still failed because they left so many women out they end up doing the same as the rest of society. The ad is STILL suggesting that you have to be a particular size to be considered beautiful. TOTAL F’ING CRAP!

PPS: Next time a guy tries to holla and says he likes a “girl with meat on her bones.” My response will be: “Well gosh I hope you like a girl with meat on her bones because if you didn’t this would mean you literally like bones. And that just sounds creepy.” Just to throw them off and be an asshole.
Ok I’m done…LOL!
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