Grinds My DAMN Gears (THE CoS EDITION): Homosexuality

Grinds My DAMN Gears (THE CoS EDITION): Homosexuality

Now first let me start off by saying if you were hoping to read a post in which I bash homosexuality and call it a sin and say gay people should move to nicely decorated island, well you’ve got the wrong post. D Frankly loves the LGBT community. If you don’t, you might want to scroll your mouse over to the popular post section of this site and choose one that’s more to your liking.

This post will be on THREE things within the topic of homosexuality that just really gets on my nerves sometimes.

Alright, now that we’ve got that out the way….





1. Gay Bashing and Homophobes:

I could go on and on about how annoying gay bashers and homophobes are with their “gay is not the way “picket signs in their left hand and their bibles in the right, quoting verses and sending folks to “straight camp” and such. But instead I’ll just say: “It’s 2013. Get yo damn life.” Seriously dude!? It really concerns you what two people do behind closed doors? You wake up in the morning and your day is ruined knowing that some gay couple is having awesome gay sex somewhere? SIT DOWN! Just get a life. There are plenty of other things in the bible we aren’t supposed do yet most of us continue to do them without a second thought. As a black young professional trying to make it in this white is right driven world, homosexuality (in the sense of saying it is not right!) is the least of my concerns! I gotta focus on my next check…that’s going to these next BILLS. YA HEARD! Real spit!

And really, you homophobes are missing out on some great entertainment. Ever been to a drag show? Watched RuPaul Drag Race or LOGO in general? Ever been to a gay or lesbian bar? Oh you haven’t. Boo. You missing out! Gay folks know how to party! Call me glorifying stereotypes but (in Jay Z voice) what do you want me to do? I’m sorry. Shit be entertaining as hell. Tell me I’m lying!



“It’s 2013. Get yo damn life” can apply to this topic as well. For those of you still in the closet worried about the taboos’ of being gay or you know…those annoying folks I mentioned above….man it’s 2013. The general public’s mind is changing about homosexuality, so if anything you would have lots of support needed to make it through this life altering time.

Recently there was a situation with a local New York City DJ getting caught for the like the THIRD time with a male prostitute. The general public already knew he was gay, yet he refused (for whatever reason) to just come out. After that third time, he ended up resigning from his current DJ’ing position and finally coming out. But it’s like dude! You had to get caught with a male prostitute THREE TIMES for you to finally admit the truth? You could have been boo’d up by now with someone you really cared about as opposed to having to pay for down low sex. But to each his own I suppose. Although, the sooner you come out the sooner you can establish your identity and really live your life without the shackles! You don’t want to be that person coming out at 72 with a spouse (of the opposite sex) and children feeling salty that they are looking at you SUPER SIDE WAYS because you’ve lived this lie for so long.  Mofo you probably knew you was gay a long ass time ago. Like maybe before you got married and before you had kids. Way too long to be pretending to be something you’re not.

comicNow, don’t get me wrong! I know I’m just a straight girl on the outside looking in, but trust that I understand it’s not easy to come out. Your parents might be disappointed. That girlfriend you’re currently faking the funk with might be brokenhearted. Your current husband might never speak to you again. Or he may try to be a creeper and get a threesome going (LOL). Who knows! , But the main point is, wouldn’t you rather be happy as opposed to sneaking around? Gay rights are on the rise and folks are living happy and open lives. Why can’t you enjoy an open and happy life too? I have a few friends that have come out within the past 5 or so years of my life and from my perspective I feel they are the better for it!

Jason Collins, Sports IllustratedIf we are basing public opinion on media, then pop culture has made it pretty clear that public opinion is changing regarding homosexuality. Gay and Lesbian couples seem to be a more regular occurrence on prime time TV. Nowadays, you see at least ONE gay couple or something of the like on TV including major networks. Just to name a few: Scandal, The New Normal, Brothers and Sisters (not currently on the air but helps my point), Greys Anatomy, Mistresses, American Horror Story (season one), Orange is the New Black. I could name more, but you get my point!
Last but not least…LET KEEP IT REAL for 5 seconds! Half of you that still believe you are in the closet aren’t really fooling anyone but yourself. You’re standing in the closet with the door open, and everyone is on the other side just waiting for your ass to come out. So c’mon out boo…don’t be shy! In addition to that, there has been countless number of celebrities that have come out and are proud! That’s BIG! And totally awesome!

*side note….when I typed in “gay men in the closet” why did Tyler Perry’s picture come up like 17 times!? LMAO!


Martin Luther King Jr. Leads March for Civil Rights  3.  Gay is NOT the New BLACK!

Now I support LGBT community and their struggle 100%! But one thing I just can’t get down with is comparing the gay rights movement to black civil rights or ANYTHING having to do with the black struggle. Granted, there are some parallels here. You know…a group of people don’t like another group of people who are different from them and want to hinder those people from prospering or living freely.  The LGBT community has definitely been discriminated against and the shit is not right. But it really AIN’T the same damn thing as how blacks have been discriminated against. First off prior to the civil rights movement there was this one thing called SLAVERY. WTF! And then after that we damn near weren’t even consider REAL PEOPLE! We weren’t allowed into buildings! We weren’t allowed to CHOOSE ANYTHING about our lives. When did something to these extremes happen to someone in the LGBT community (from a legal standpoint)? Someone please enlighten me! Not suggesting that people in the LGBT community ain’t never got they ass kicked for the fact that they were gay BUT my point still remains.

This is what happened when we protested for our rights!

I was watching some reality show on TV one day. And a gay white male and a white female got on a debate about homosexuality. She stated that she did not support the lifestyle and she would vote no to legalizing gay marriage (this was obviously a minute ago). He became extremely offended. Literally started crying saying “How can you, a privilege white woman, dictate how I and other folks like me live our lives? It’s not fair! It’s not right! It wasn’t too long ago when white people did the same thing to black people.” (Or something to THAT effect).


Let’s pause for a second Mr. White man. Although you are gay, you still at the top of the food chain being a WHITE MALE. Your sexual preference doesn’t override the fact that you still get hired, promoted and paid more BECAUSE you are a white male. People don’t completely write him off as he walks into a room as people STILL do with women and people of color. Some people may not even realize he’s gay! Unless he’s vouging to RuPaul’s “Cover Girl” in the middle of his office or at an interview (although that would be hilarious) no one will really discriminate against him right off without the facts! You pretty much HAVE to make the statement that you are gay for folks to really have the right to put that label on you publicly. No matter how obvious it may be. If you don’t STATE IT then it’s not true. My black skin is not something I can hide. It’s a label that was automatically placed on me based on my genes. I’m black. No deciding I don’t want to be black later in life. It’s not a label that I willing apply to myself and chose to associate with. With that being said, him being gay isn’t putting a hindrance on his general privilege. If anything he’s still MORE privileged than that white WOMAN he just tried to put the guilt trip on.

I’d love for this guy to have a conversation with a BLACK LESBIAN! She could really school him on the struggle for real! She’s black, she’s a woman AND she’s lesbian. First, she has to deal with society treating her like sh*t because she’s black. THEN she has to deal with society putting her second because she’s a woman. And on top of that, she’s lesbian too! Society say’s “get outta here now!” I’m sure Mr. Gay White man would be ready to kill himself walking a day in her shoes. And I would make sure he wouldn’t be walking in the FIERCE four inch platform red bottoms! He’d be walking in the generic Payless two inchers that ain’t impressing nobody, just to drill the point home!

Now the story mentioned above is just ONE example of the many times I’ve seen people comparing gay rights to black civil rights. And it’s like alright, at the end of the day I can’t hide, change, remove or act like I’m not black. The shit follows me wherever I go. I haven’t noticed any signs on doors or over sinks and toilets saying “No Gays” or “Straights’ Only.” But what the hell do I know?


So with all that being said…it’s 2013! Stop gay bashing cause you sound dumb. You sound really dumb for real (insert Antoine Dodson)! Secondly, come out the closet already. LOGO has proved it’s ok (LOL)! And last but NOT LEAST do not compare gay civil rights to black civil rights. Two different struggles, but of course LGBT supporting Blacks will always have your back!

That concludes my “grinds my DAMN gears” rant.

Until next time SQUARES!

D Frankly